Reflecting on the White Supremacy Narrative (2/3)
Continuing my deep dive on anti-whiteness, my point of view was regularly challenged, and I was inspired to reflect further on how my thoughts and experiences were punctuated by racial dynamics. One of the first concepts that stood out to me was the idea of tone policing. Tone policing refers to the idea of white individuals dismissing or criticizing non-white people because of their impassioned tone of voice. My reaction to this concept was conflicted. I understand and recognize that tone policing may exist, however, I fail to think back on any examples from my own past where I was explicitly guilty of tone policing. I also realized that I view tone policing, both self-imposed and directed towards others, as a necessary part of a respectful and productive dialogue. It is intuitively understood that yelling and speaking aggressively is counterproductive to a respectful discussion as it makes one lose sight of their rationality and begin to respond emotionally. However, after reflecting, I recognize that this may be my own bias at play. Just because I do not prefer to interact this way with others, does not mean that it will match the communication style of other cultures. For example, this bias is recognizable in a number of videos depicting police brutality which have become popularized on the internet. It is not uncommon to see police officers reacting harshly and often physically to verbal attacks from people of color. These types of reactions are unacceptable, and it does beg the question of whether the police might react in the same way if there were a white person yelling.
Reflecting on communication styles also made me think about some of my experiences at work. Where I work, I am one of few white-passing employees. Most of my coworkers are Jamaican and Haitian which gives me a regular window into the subtleties of their communication. Often, I will approach two or more coworkers, involved in a passionate conversation. When I approach, they will sometimes change their tone of voice, cadence, and volume to match a communication style that I am more accustomed to. This could be another example of tone policing, not from me or another white person, but self-imposed by my coworkers for my benefit. In recognizing this, I cannot help but wonder, however, if this is a black/white issue, or if it is simply cultural. For example, Italians are often stereotyped as talking passionately and loudly, and my Egyptian family rarely have conversations at what I would consider to be a calm and even-tempered volume.
Separately, I have also come to think of racism differently along this journey. Of course, racism is undoubtedly evil. In some rare cases it is overt, but in many, it can be subtle. However, I wonder whether racism, for many people, might be born of lazy thinking. Just as stereotypes are a shortcut or a heuristic, I wonder if racism is a shortcut for people who are taught negative perspectives, or who have had a disproportionate number of bad experiences from a particular race. For argument's sake, if I am robbed or cheated by three different men wearing yellow hats, will I develop a bias and automatically associate men in yellow hats with bad outcomes? While I might cognitively understand that not all men wearing yellow hats are dangerous, my “lazy thinking” may undermine this understanding and cause me to despise or fear men matching that description.
Once again, I found myself questioning the racial lens of the ideas espoused by these books. However, I have also come across sources that made valid and impactful points without resorting to stereotyping or gross overreaching. In one of my past classes, we read the book Biased by Jennifer Eberhardt. This book outlined the bias that is alive in each of us, as humans, in a way that was objective and measured. Biased recounted Eberhardt’s extensive research that clearly illustrated the impact that biases have in our society, with special focus on black and white relations. It is eye opening and I highly recommend it to anyone who believes they are evolved past personal biases. Books like White Supremacy and Me, however, are written in a style that strikes me as too self-assured and leaves no room for questions or alternative explanations for subtleties in race relations outside of racism.
Unfortunately, books like Biased are the exception and I trudged through the popular literature pushing an anti-white narrative that was largely discouraging. Then, in one of my classes, we were encouraged to immerse ourselves in a culture we are unfamiliar with. This was exciting to me, and seemed to have much greater potential for actual learning than reading the same points of view espoused over and over. I was encouraged by this process. Getting out of my comfort zone and learning about another culture was enjoyable and challenging in a positive way. In many regards, it opened my eyes to my own ignorance and excited me about the prospect of continuing to learn throughout my career. In some strange way, I feel that it made me a better person. As we get older, our personality ‘grooves’ get deeper and harder to change but being exposed to another culture up close is allowing me to recapture that old feeling of being humbled by how little I know. It made me excited about the magic of diversity that had been cheapened and extorted by the information I had been immersed with.
In writing this reflection it is clear to me that there are still a great deal of questions I hold surrounding this topic. The topic of racism is a messy one, and with it, there are many new, messy concepts that come with it. Part of this experience, for me, was sorting through these ideas, one by one, and separating the good from the bad. This was not an easy process and it will likely continue throughout my life. However, I want to share that this type of work has proven extremely valuable in an age where questions surrounding race are ubiquitous. I am optimistic that I have made progress in my personal journey, slowly and steadily evolving my perspective on race issues to be more fair and understanding.
